Day 16

I have the worst dentist of all time. Yesterday, right before he was about to start pulling, I said, "Uh, doc... are we forgetting something?" He paused, and then exclaimed, "Oh, right - novocaine!"

This has been a true story.

Day 15 (or, "Farrah and Michael, we hardly knew y'all")

Today, America mourns the passing of two anorexic white women.

Day 14

Day 13

Recipe

1 cup flour,
2/3 cup sugar,
half dozen eggs,
1 pie crust,
and finally,
1 search engine:

Koogle.com

Day 12

Day 10

There's a general prohibition in my law school against arguing for better grades... for obvious reasons. Can you imagine if grade-debating was allowed? We're future lawyers, for god's sake! There would be eighty appeals filed each time a teacher gave a test! And the appeals would be specific, too - citations and everything. "See the landmark case of Josh v. Professor Burbles, circa 2005, for the proposition that a ten-word answer can, in fact, constitute a legitimate essay. See also the apple I left on your desk last Tuesday (reversed on other grounds)."

Day 7

"Able was I ere I saw Alba."

-Cash Warren

Day 6

The first time I was ever called to a dress rehearsal, I wasn’t quite sure what to expect. Then, a guy showed up who was actually WEARING a dress. But that wasn’t the weird part. The weird part was when he asked me to zip him up.

Apparently the dress was for a dream sequence in the play. I asked the director why the character would wear a dress in his dream sequence, and the director responded, “because, honey, there’s a drag queen in each and every one of us.” I muttered, “I think that guy got two drag queens and I didn’t get any.”

Day 5

Day 4

Day 2

Day 1

Today I was on the subway and saw three men sitting next to each other. One was skinny, one was medium-sized, and one was really fat, so I yelled... "Set!"